i am going to unfold a tale that dates back to the time when when i was in school,5th standard..this story would have better suited in a section like 'i was kid and moron'..haha i still perfectly remember the hot summer afternoon, and the class room environment was steamed up more because one, our classroom had no windows and second, our english mam was about to distribute our unit test copies, all students were sweaty because of any two of the above mentioned reasons but not me not because i wasn't afraid of her wooden scale with which all low scorers would be beaten up or i didn't felt hot...it was just because of some biological conditions, i don't sweat..nobody was more tensed than me and sreya ..we had seen our all other subject test copies, there was a difference of one mark between our total, the total that was deciding the first unit test topper of std. five, she was ahead of me.i just needed two more marks to come first, there was no expectation from other students as they were lagging far behind..some mischievous guys were betting about us.finally she started distributing our test copies, my mind frenzied as she started distributing roll number wise, as my name begins from A, my turn came up early after few students who had not done well collected their copies with destructive criticism about their answers, she called my name and i walked with bated breath towards mam, she had fixed her gaze on me..and everyone else also..she handed me copy and smiled.i wasn't able to smile back..there was no total marks written on the front sheet, we were supposed to do total ourselves..anxiously i started totalling on my way back to the bench and everyone began asking 'how much?' few seconds after i realized i have got 52 out of 60, this was not less in her subject but not even more enough to confirm rank..me and sreya were almost same in english, once we have counted our all remarks in english notes..i had 5 goods, 3 very goods and 1 excellent while she had 8 goods and 2 excellents..almost same i told to myself..after few more people got their copies..i realized mine was not heighest..suddenly a guy had come up with highest chandan 2,there was one more chandan. finally sreya's turn came up..mam smiled to her too...i tried to look in her copy..there were big big ticks and i felt strain in every nerve..as she started totalling..her total came out be 49..her face became dull and mine brightened up..finally i was the topper..and mam don'teasily increase marks, she started sobbing..i felt little bad for her..others started talking about me..my percentage and all and i started day dreaming how proudly i'll tell to mummy, how much happy she will be.sreya asked me if she can see my test copy..i gave it to her as if its work was all over..she scanned it all up in a minute..comparing all answers and soon found out that one of her answers are same and she has not been given marks for that..before i could see which answer, she took the copy to mam..and demanded more marks..i was overwrought why i gave her my copy..it was two marks question...mam scrutinized the two copies and found out that the answer was wrong that is why she was not awarded marks and she cut my two marks..the two marks that had made me stood first, this was tear jerking and my all day dreams about what will i demand at home was all gonehowever our total was same, i just had to share the first title ..somehow i consoled myself to control tears but that was not over i got a secondary shock that there was one question where mam missed checking in her copy and she got 4 marks extra...now i was not able to assuage myself...i took my copy and begged mam for extra marks showing my all answers saying that i deserve more than what i got..my glottal accent and sobbing didn't help..there was no increase...i felt like a looser and started crying like hell..everybody was agog with curiousity, sreya looked nonplussed..this was embarrasing even in class 5th..i never wanted to cry but silly tears..u know, i felt like a kid that time...although i was a kid only.mam tried to console me..but i didn't wanted to listen to her...i thought her responsible for this situation, i would not have felt that bad at the second position if it was in a simple way..i came back home and cried in mummy's lap..she was happy that i did well and my rank was no matter. she brought about that this is just beginning..life is not always the way we want it to be..and we should never compare ourselves with anyone or we will linger endlessly in feelings of jealousy and would fall in situations like this.everyone is unique..we can aspire to be someone else but cannot be anyone else...so just be the best 'you' that you can possibly be. you cannot live whole life compared to anyone or many. from that day i never compared marks..although my rank degraded..but i never felt nasalized or stressed.i try doing 'my' best..and whatever the result..JUST CHILL
Comments (7 so far )
Anyways, thank you for taking me back to the wonderful yesterday.
Thanks once again for this piece of writing.