I have been having different moods and different feelings for days, and I have been unable to recognize them. I thought that they are just my usual mood swings. But, seriously they are not, as my heart kept on telling me! I did have something wrong in me. I was having feelings of dejection, deep grief of something departing away, and those of continuous melancholy. It was evident that I was having these feelings for the first time. Yes, for the first time. I have been having the feelings of FEAR! Fears have been taking birth inside me and I was so ignorant that I did not bother to give time to myself!
You may be astonished by the point that I have been experiencing the feelings of fear for the first time! Yes, it is true! And it is unlike any other fear. It is the fear of being lost! Being lost as if you are not what you used to be, seeing yourself getting collapsed, doing those strange bad things which you did not expect of yourself, being just ordinary, losing value for yourself, thinking strange about yourself, not moving ahead, getting more sensitive, feeling as if you are going to lose all your power and strength, and just feeling alone internally all the time and trying to pacify yourself with false assumptions that all is well.
And it is the greatest fear anyone can experience! It is that fear which is kept buried! People don’t fight this fear most often! Either because they are unable to recognize this or because they just don’t care!
Now, what is the fear of being lost? Let me tell you, it is the fear which the earlier recognized, the easier to fight! But you cannot feel this fear if it becomes a part of you due to your ignorance!
It is the fear which, when starts growing, makes you feel strange and keeps on trying to gain your attention and appears in different and sudden mood swings_ the changes in mood of which you are unaware of any specific cause. Now at this stage, people either choose to take it as just the mood swings or they really give time to themselves to figure out what is wrong with them! Mood swings are not that serious that they can make you cry and give you a feeling of serious disgust for yourself! Those who avoid this prevailing condition for long become habitual of it and thus this disease of fear becomes a part of them which adversely affects their character and personality, it can also destroy their soul! But those who are care, win the fight!
Now, the question is what it reason of this fata fear? Yes, it is important to know this because without knowing this you cannot take the appropriate steps to fight your fear! The fear which eats you up internally and jeopardizes your state of tranquility is the fear of forgetting Allah (the only supreme power). Yes! You are nothing without Him! When you start forgetting Him, you soul gets disturbed ! Every part of your body loses it coordination! Your hear t and mind don’t work together! Your feet are not moved in the direction of the goodness, your tongue forgets to speak the words of beauty! Your eyes stop seeing the richness of natural beauty and the goodness of every matter! Your hands don’t stop writing for the real causes! Your heart stop beating for ‘LOVE’ and your mind just locks the doors of CONSCIENCE! Thus, when you breaks the purest relation of the universe, you get destroyed mentally and internally! You don’t get satisfaction in whatever you do, for satisfaction is the name of purity of soul! Your soul starts getting impure when you stop praying! When you forget your Creator, you forget yourself! And you find yourself in the state of oblivion.
You may think what a pessimist approach I have adopted to describe that! But, my friends, I am not saying not to be optimistic or not to tackle the matters with an optimistic approach! Yes ,it is good sometimes to ignore the mood swings. But it is fatal to ignore when it comes to the satisfaction of your soul! Satisfaction is that blessing which you have to earn! So, when you feel such an amalgam of feelings arising inside you, just don’t ignore it! Give some time to yourself to analyze and compare that where you were and where you are now! Believe me, Allah is the most merciful and the most benevolent; He forgives the moment you turn to Him!
Just don’t get lost in the lights of this enchanted world, for there is another world waiting for you!
