“Why do you want to be a teacher?” The HR manager asked me. “ I DON’T WANT TO BE A TEACHER, PERIOD! Please fire me even before hiring me. Tell me you don’t like my face. Whatever, just tell me you don’t want me so that I can get the hell out of your office and go home to my unimportant I mean unburdened life, full of lame facebooking, I mean happy, joyous, fun hours spent on internet and have my parents off my back! I DON’T WANT TO TEACH” but that is what I was screaming in my head, along with some intangible obscenities. Out loud I said; “Because I can be. I can do this, I have the potential.” I replied with confidence ( read: over confidence). Yea, charm them, go ahead you beauty! She smiled and directed me to a class and left me there. Now let’s pause a bit and rewind the story.
I get a call for a teaching job. I had not wanted to be a teacher, I am of a different field altogether and over qualified for the job but I go in anyway. All that trouble, just to hear them say, I have the job and when they do, I will smirk in haughty narcissism. Yes, I am my favorite person. So while I was walking to the class, clicking away on the polished floor, surrounded by the cacophony of unidentifiable choruses, emanating from all around the corridors, behind the closed mahogany doors, I kept telling myself I am not going to take this job. Me, I am above these little devils. I have just graduated, I don’t want to be someone, I loathed for so many years! Ha! What would my friends say? No, I have the job, and I will love the look on their faces when I decline. There is simply no way I would settle for this. Now let’s get on with it. So I am in the room, there are roughly 20 girls there, aging around 13 or 14. The door shuts behind me and then I turn to look at them. Silence. They are looking back at me, their eyes boring a hole in my body, that intense a look.
“Okay, if you are done looking, let’s get on with it.” I say with a breath of coldness.
They giggle. OMG! That’s actually a cute sound! These little rascals can make a sound like that? Wait, what are my lips trying to do, why are they going in opposite direction? DO NOT SMILE! REPEAT! DOFRIGGIN’NOT SMILE! I pretend to clear my throat. Crises averted.
Twenty minutes of pin drop silence ensue, as that beautiful strong voice of this lady I love (here is a Hint: it’s me) drones on about evolution. Oh! I have never made myself more proud about me! The Words flowing out as smoothly as a river snaking languorously. All eyes on me, a little dilated pupils and awe oozing out of my audience. Hello! Are they smiling again? I should detain them! How dare they Smile! This isn’t a cartoon! Oh wait, I can’t do that, I am still just testing, I haven’t taken the job. Oh ehem, imagining much? Why the hell are my lips twitching again!?
“You see, evolution is not just a big, mean scary word with Lamarck and Darwin happily at work making it all the more Gloomy and boring. Evolution is within us. We all evolve daily, we learn new things, we adapt better. So in fact, all of you have evolved from what you were yesterday to what you are today. It’s kind Of like that ‘ugly duckling’ story you read in kindergarten. The little grey duckling grew up to be a Beautiful swan, although she was so sure she didn't have the potential to be but what she didn't Know was that there was more beauty hidden inside her. All she had to do was evolve.” Wait! Did I Just tell them a little story?
How the hell did I start with evolution and end at ugly duckling? Get out of here! You are making a royal ass of yourself! “Miss?” I come out of my schizophrenic fit and look up. A girl, a chubby little girl with fair skin and silky dark hair is raising her hand.”Hmm?” “ Miss, does this mean that all of us would evolve to be good looking like those girls we see on TV and in magazines?” I look around their faces and suddenly I see there is another girl in the last bench. How did she get here? That bench was empty a second ago. Hang on, why does she look like….Holy mother! This kid looks a clone copy of me when I was 14! Sensing as if she has heard my thought, she nods. I nod back at me. I turn my attention to the girl. “Umm you know what kiddo? You are going to turn out better. All of you. Without a ton of makeup they put on those girls, without having to be stressed about job and working at such a tender age..I can see you already, way more stunning then those fake girls.” I smile at them.(Yes, I did, smite me down if you want!) Gone, the little me, she is gone. She isn’t there. What was that? “Miss?” I crane my neck to look at another girl, sitting two rows down on left.” Miss, would we grow up to be like you?” I do a double take. Why would she want to be me? I am great but then why? She reads the confusion etched on my face so she continues, albeit haltingly. “It’s just that…I..We wanted you to know that we think you are great. Who tells a fairy tale in science? And now, if anyone asked me what evolution was, I could answer that in my sleep..so would we ‘evolve’ to be the story telling type like you are?” She is back, I mean I am back from the past, but not in the back seat. This time, it’s me I see in all those faces, me before I went to being that snooty, drunk on freedom, without any burden, almost an adult; the same girl who looked up to her teachers because they were her superheroes; her Wonder Girls, her Mr Incredibles, her protecting angels. Now, I understood why I was hallucinating like that..I weigh out words before I eject them on to my little enthralled spectators..”The thing is..” The door opens, the HR manager is back. “I am afraid, that would be all for today, let’s talk over tea, the kids have already missed half their recess.” I was nodding and smiling at her but at the recess part I stopped and turned to look at them. “ Why didn’t anyone of you tell me your recess hour had started?” I asked them “because, we were curious about the end, we wanted to hear you talk. You talk good, Miss.” One of them said while the others bobbed their heads. I am stunned into silence. I pick up my coat and bag and walk out as a racket of confusing blabber erupts behind me. “You know, I have never seen them giving up their recess for a teacher, specially science. I was listening to your take on evolution. It’s good way, relating it to a story so they learn better, you would make a good teacher.” She smiles at me as she hands me a cup of tea. “If you want the job, it’s yours.” SILENCE. I am on throes of mutinying emotions within me. The snooty, half assed me is back, looking bored, chewing on to her manicured nail, lounging against the door.”You are not a teacher, teachers are lame, they yell, they give you bad grades on purpose; they essentially are a pain in ass. No. Don’t take it. So what you don’t have a job. You’re plenty rich. You don’t need to work princess. Yes, we don’t need to be a teacher, we are already remarkable, we already have fans, G.” Yes, I can’t be a teacher, I have to get out of here. And fast! I start, “Miss..the thing is…with all due respect I am no..” There she is again, the 14 year old me and this times she whispers. “Take it, how many chances will you get to change lives, develop natures, evolve minds…take it, you miss me, you miss the simplified you. Those girls are your connection to me, your connection to the real you, the person you are underneath the cocky vanity, a better person. Be a superhero..”
“Miss, you were saying?”
“When can I start here?”
Yes, I am a teacher because teachers rock!
