A day back she had broken up with me. There was this message that was from her. I never recieved any message thence. My eyes shone at the sight of "Inbox (1)" and a smile flashed across my face, the message read "Dare you not message me again". After this I didn't count how many times I messaged her, but all in vain. It seemed like I was a mad demanding response from a dead. Exhausted I thought, whom should I share my break-up story with? The long queue of friends passed my mind each of them shouting at me "Irfan bhai, aap aur laundiya-baazi?!! Wo namaazein kya humein dikhaney ke liye pedhte they?". Then I thought of confiding in my parents, but saw their angry faces shouting at me "Dilli kya isi bay-hayaaee ke liya bheja tha? Kitna samjha ke bheja tha, Ki Allah ko mat bhoolna, Namaaz roza karte rehna...sab mitti mein mila diya". Scared, I decided to keep the gnawing loneliness to myself. Got up and went to the Select City mall, in a hope that amidst the crowd, I won't feel lonely.As I entered the mall, I caught the sight of couples getting cozy. These images of people sitting with hands around their partner's waist took me in the flash back, and an angry voice screamed at me: "Chale they paighambar (prophet) banne, kam-as-kam ek kiss bhi kiya hota, to aaj inko dekh ke dil to nahin jaltaa". Again her message "Dare you not message me again" echoed through my mind, and my eyes were gossamered with angry tears.I exited the mall, took an auto and came back to my room. I switched on the laptop and opened the porn folder. Opened a file wherein a man was making love to a woman. I opened my zip, irritated my glans and got an erection, it went around for half an hour that I kept stroking my penis and it began hurting. I looked for some oil to use as lubricant but noticed it was finished. I concentrated hard and imagined I was the man making love to Shagun, after few seconds some drops of pre-cum oozed out and served as lubricant. I kept stroking for another few minutes and when I was about to cum, the same message shouted at me "don't you dare message me again". A new wave of anger gripped me and my erection receded away without an orgasm. I felt silent. Once again tears flooded my eyes. I cried like a baby. Then, I slept ...that too...like a baby.Following morning I woke up and went to the Masjid, offered my prayers and did my dua: "Ya Allah teri ek khoobsoorat makhlook ne mujhe terey raastey se bhatkaa diya tha. Shahyad tujhe bhoolne ki ye sazaa hai, ki usi shaks ki bewafaaee aaj waapas tere paas laayi hai. Ya Allah mujhe maaf kar day aur apne raaste pe chalne ki taufeeq ataa kar."
