My Side of Story : Chapter 1

Its about a love triangle, a triangle where there is too much of love. Me, Radhika and Neha. Everyone loves everyone, with varying magnitude and varying ways, own ways. It has been going around since a long long time with no solution, no end. Everyone's heartbroken and its awkward between them. Its complicated.

Me and Neha studied together and were school friends. We liked each other. When I came in college, we confessed our feelings and entered into a relationship. Long distance. Things went good for sometime and then it turned suffocating for me. Sometimes I felt she didn't love me. Feelings went weaker from my side and I had been swinging like a pendulum for a breakup or no breakup. I dropped the idea because it was long distance, and she would cry. She would cry a lot. There would be a flood in Ganaga, I knew it.

Life was sad at this point of time due to my emotional upheaval and then one day I saw a girl. The day my simple stupid, not that boring life went total crazy. Her name was Radhika.

Initially I just liked looking at her and being around her but then we became friends. And I was stupid enough to make my crush my best friend. At this point of time I would laugh if someone says 'she's my best friend' ... experienced people would agree. We spent so much time together and she shared her life with me. All her joy, sorrow, resentments and the rest. We grew dependent on each other over the time. My feelings grew and started showing symptoms.

In the meanwhile Neha is still there in my life. Now we talked less. I still cared about her but that love was gone from my side. Suffocation started growing. Academics fucked up, one sided love, fear of losing someone on whom I depended so much, and few other things and I broke up with Neha on 19th Feb. Ya, valentine's day was not over yet properly.

It was the first breakup and I was almost dead. I always thought I had no real feelings for Neha but end of a relationship is like someone is no longer in this world. Its like you have been living with someone and suddenly they are gone. And it was like this because I intended to not go back to her ever. No hope. There was indeed flood in Ganga that week, or even month I don't know.

When Radhika got to know about my breakup, she almost stopped talking to me.

Next month following that was more interesting ...

more in next post ...maybe tonight ...

P.S: I don't intend to hurt anyone by by words. But the story will go on.