We were at the school sports meet. My son, in the primary, was running the 100 meter race that day.
He ran but failed to meet the mark ahead of others. He soon ran up to me. Some other parents were seated next to me.
"Mama, I lost today," he said smiling.
I hugged him tightly.
"It's okay, baby, you did well," I told him.
I let him be.
That smile of his mesmerized me then. He hadn't got the full impact of his performance, had he? Wasn't he too young to get it?
Sometimes he surprised us. Especially at the prize day function, when he walked up on stage to get the first prize for academic performance. We had been kept completely in the dark.
Later he never stood first. Somewhere in the top five, then slowly top ten.
"Whether you win or lose, it really doesn't matter. Give it your best shot."
That's how I encouraged my kids.
I do nag them, I must confess..not a perfect Mom really... but then I feel so bad for them.. I go back and encourage them to try again.
"Don't compete with others, but only with your past performance." The best advice from his former school principal. I can never forget it.
I tried sending them to painting, swimming classes. It didn't work. The griping, complaining did me in. I gave up.
So, when other Moms put their kids into numerous classes....
I just let them be.
They picked up the guitar and started strumming it. They're at it still.
Technical stuff interests them. The latest gadgets, mobile apps and games are their favorite pass time too.
I let them be.
His boards are now around the corner. The intense competition has kids, especially Moms chewing on nails. Stress kills them.
But here, well, we watched 'Great escape' till late yesterday.
Some day, in the near future, he may return, shoulders drooping, the full impact received.
"Ma, I lost today."
It might be a lucrative offer or a promising project...
I'd still welcome him home.
With sunshine warmth and a loving smile.
He'll be what he'll be.
And I choose to let him be!
