Are half-truths lies? If so, are they "better" lies?
Imagine yourself where you repeatedly tell a half-truth to someone because you think they'd not like or understand the full truth, or because you think they'd have a 'problem' with it but in your head is completely legit, just a point-of-view issue, so they don't really need to know. It is likely the "someone" here is important enough that you care how they think/feel/perceive you. How does telling those half truths make you feel? E.g. Telling your parents you're going out with friends while you're going out with a certain 'friend' because you don't want them to know/ overreact. Or telling your best friend you're going out with boring office colleagues when you really have to go out with a new close friend because it is quite awkward. Telling your wife/husband you're crashing at your (guy/girl) friend's place tonight, while really its one of your girl/guy friends you'd crash at, because you're not doing anything wrong, just avoiding an inconvenient conversation.
I don't think it'd be hard to imagine what I ask for many of us. We say convenient half truths and little lies ALL the freaking time. So what's the big deal?
The big deal is to me, at least, sometimes these little lies rankle a lot. We say them because we care about the other person's feelings or beliefs, and want to sidestep rather than hurt them. We do it anyway because we're convinced we're not doing anything wrong, but we also would rather have them not know than know the full truth. It's a really fine line. Most days indifference is probably ok. Some days it's not. Some days the guilt wakes me up at night. Some days I wonder how I would feel if I were being led to. And then I realize I would "understand" quite easily and not 'think' much of it, but the way the 'lie' would make me feel is a very different kind of pain. The pain that lingers. The pain which 'knows' and yet where you're quiet because you understand.
And then I wonder, wasn't pain what we are avoiding in the first place anyway? Why damage trust for a little bit of convenience?
Isn't trust TOO precious for that?
Is it too hard to do a direct honest conversation upfront, battle through a bit of temporary heartache if any, and live peacefully truthfully thereafter?
