I put shaving cream all over my face. And my neck. Damn those neck hair. I take out the razor. I start with right cheek. Then slowly come to the chin, and then left cheek. Nice and clean. Nice and clean. Then I hold the razor under the tap. There are some hair, trapped over the blade. I want them gone. I slide my left thumb and try to wash the blade thoroughly.
"Oh, Shit", I scream.
I’ve just cut my thumb. Two scars, nearly three centimetres each. Then at the flash of eyes, blood starts pouring out of it. Dark red fluid. It's been flowing through all the time, all over my body and I'd no idea about it until this very moment. I put the thumb in my mouth instantly.
Hmm, now I am tasting the blood. I cannot explain the joy in words. It's tasty ! Am I a vampire ? I swallow blood and then look at the thumb again. I see scars turn red. I suck the blood once more. But scars again turn red, as I stop. Then suck again, then again. Damn, that blood is so stubborn. This scares me.
I hold the thumb under cold water flow. I take the ice cube from fridge. I rub it over injury. No use. That red, viscous fluid wants to get out, in an open air. It’s been waiting for this moment for long. There's no way to stop it now. My hand is numb. My body is shaking. I must do something quickly. I seek for handkerchief, then get one, tie it around injury. Now the scars aren't visible. I sigh with a relief. After a minute, my handkerchief turns red !
I am in trouble. I cannot feel my left hand. I cannot move it. I am losing all my blood. I am losing it. I feel weak. I sit on a ground. I tap on my left hand using right one. I feel nothing. I've lost one complete hand. Blood is still flowing and the flow is faster than ever. I am crying. Emotional pain and physical pain are together attacking me. My blood is leaving my body and I can do nothing. My eyes are closing. I lie on floor. I wish to scream, but can't do it. I go deeper and deeper, into the darkness. I forget everything. It's just darkness now that accompanies me. Utter darkness. Black is not a colour. It's absence of every colour, I think.
Then slowly, there I see, the light source. At a distance. Is that the famous light ? Is it what people see when they die ? Am I dead ? I run towards the light. And, a sheer disappointment. That source is the moon. It's in the sky. I cannot reach it. Every time I walk towards it, it goes farther away. I stop. I have to take efforts to see what's around me. I am at some house. I've seen this place, I've been here, why can't I remember it ? These walls, they are very familiar. I know this place. Oh yes, my grandpa's house ! I've spent all my summer vacations here. That was fifteen-twenty years ago. We’d play 'hide and seek’ here, and that’s why I know this place from corner to corner ! There's my grandpa's chair. He'd sit there and tell us stories. Every night one story. Every time a new story. Though I haven't visited this place for long time, I still remember every memory of it vividly.
Then I wander, look everything, touch everything, feel fragrance. The place disappoints me. There’s not a single person, not a single sign of life. It is as bad as darkness.
I come to gallery, I look at the sky and scream,
"So is it all over ? Is this what happens to the dead people ?"
I pause, no answer. Then again I shout,
"No heaven, no hell ? Nothing ? Is it all over ? Is this a dead end ?"
Still no answer. I feel frustrated.
I feel like I'm sweating. But there isn't any sign of sweat over my body. I am furious at whoever that caused me this.
I shout and shout,
'Is this a dead end ?'
'Is..this..a..DEAD..END ????'
And then,
I wake up.
I was saying something, wasn't I? I was sleep talking. Have I just had a bad dream? Something horrible. I often forget dreams. This isn't new. But I wish, I'd remembered this particular one. I do remember something about it- DEAD END. What does it mean? Leave. I give up. Don't wanna start day like this.
I walk straight to the basin. I look at the mirror on front wall. Damn those neck hair. I put shaving cream all over my face. Nice and clean, nice and clean.
"Oh god" I scream. I’ve just cut my left thumb. Two scars, three centimetres each. Scars turn red. I put it in the mouth.
Now I’m sucking the blood. Ah, tasty blood. Am I the vampire ? Blood's been flowing profusely. This scares me.
Then Ice cube, and then handkerchief. No use. Blood is unstoppable. I'm losing it. My hand is numb, body’s been shaking. I wish to scream, but can't do it. I close my eyes. It's just darkness now that accompanies me.
Then, I see the light source. Is it what people see when they die? Am I dead? I run towards the source and then I realise light source is in fact the moon. Sheer disappointment.
Then I look around. I’ve to take efforts to see what’s around me. Oh, it’s my grandpa's house ! I remember everything about it vividly. I used to play ‘hide and seek’ here. I know this place from corner to corner. Look Here, grandpa’s chair. He’d sit here and tell us stories. Every night one story. Every time a new story.
There’s no person in that house. I see no sign of life. Then I come to gallery and scream.
'Is this a dead end?'
No answer.
I yell again,
"Is..this..a..DEAD..END ????"
And then,
I wake up...
