Its funny how an empty room can bring about such thoughts. Fearful, yet thoughts that can hardly be seen by the minds under usual feelings. The chair supported my posture in the middle of an empty room with nothing but a window allowing my gaze to stare at nothing but the moon, a clock ticking its way along the fabric and complete darkness giving away its presence like a king at the moment. My fingers knew nothing of what my mind was asking them to do, curling around into each other representing nothing but despair. I soon got possessed by the usual demon.
I was always afraid. Not of darkness but what comes with it. The demons. Yes, my demons. All my life I have been running away into the hopeless dark woods from the very same demon that had been haunting me all along. Its existence might be nothing but a long lost legend but I believe that it exists. Every man is haunted by the demons of the past and I am no different than them. Every man has their own demons. Mine was but one, the absentmindedness. It haunted me with a face of happiness and pleasure. A false masquerade. I knew well of its intentions. It always waits with a bait, a bait called pleasant dreams. My fragile heart refuses the fact of it being another masquerade. And falls for it. The more time I spend with it, the more it snatches away my reality. I have lived in a life that never even existed. The time went by. The dream that it showed sure was pleasant but it lacked something important. Something I couldn't recognize. A trap. Yes, the same obvious trap of my enemy. I have fell for it. I knew it so damn well, yet I fell for it again and again, again and again. I grabbed my senses back to reality. "Its too late now, mate!" whispered the demon. My desire to bring myself back became powerless against those demonic words. Not because it was demonic but because seemed so true. A false truth can be a dangerous weapon if used under proper contexts. I knew it. All of it. The trap, the loss, the masquerade and the false truth too. But yet I fell for them. "Why?" asked the helpless me. "Its different, knowing and realizing. They are two faces of a coin." said the monster in masquerade. I needed to come back. Why? because dreaming is different than living it. I wanted to live it and that demanded my present mind. I now realized it. The demon repeated its words, 'its too late mate',... I didn't care. Because living even a part of the dream I have dreamed of.
Why should I ever be afraid of this demon of mine? Its existence after all, depends on me. I control its existence. I am the master and it is my servant. Why? Because it is a part of me. I am not the prey, I am not the predator nor am I a masquerade, I am all of it. I am the master of my existence and of the demons inside.
Hands stopped shaking. My eyes kept on gazing at the silent moon. The electricity illuminated my room. The new fresh existence of my friends echoed in through the emptiness. A confident curve of smile decorated my face.
-Bk
