'What you see is only the tip of the iceberg.' I can't take responsibility of the entire community, but I have dealt with quite a good number of people in Pune. On this basis, I can say that this statement is true for Gay community.
What society see is only the tip of the community. What they see is people fighting for their right and educating them about the community. There are rallies and many opinions about the homosexuality. Supports put forth examples of the mention of homosexuality in ancient India whereas counterpart say it's a sin in Indian culture. These people are unaware that there is a lot more things that go in the community. There are questions raised on the identity, and most importantly on preference and looks.
I have been chatting with people since 2006, when I came to Pune for my graduation. Before coming here, I had a notion that people fall in love because of the qualities and not mainly because of looks. Since I was looking for relationship, I never paid much attention looks. Soon I realised that looks play a vital role in Gay community.
When I start a chart with anyone, I try to know that person, his hobbies, and about his life. What I observed is people were interested in seeing my face pic before getting into any conversation. You send them a nice introductory message and you get a reply, "Pic?" Initially I didn't mind sending my face pic to them, thinking that may be there weren't comfortable answering the questions. But when everyone starts to vanish soon after seeing my pic, I realised I am not good enough to converse.
It took a while to understand that no matter what you seek; fun, friendship or relationship, look is important. You might come across a nicely written profile, with some big words and proper expression upon which you might feel that the guy is genuine and nice, but you will end up with a request of pic in first few lines.
Gay community is driven by looks and not by nature or quality of a person. Here, if you're handsome and good looking, you will receive endless requests and chats in a day. On the other hand, if you have a good heart with an average look, you will end up nothing. You may come across a nice profile but until you don't have a good look, you will end up with nothing.
We always say that relationship of any sort is controlled by emotions. There are people who are good at heart and can fulfill your psychological need, but they end up being alone on weekends. We are ask for acceptance from the world but demonstrate differentiation on the basis of looks and stature. I speak for all those who get rejections only because of their looks, 'I am not be the handsome person in the world, I may not have the look of an actor, but peep inside my heart, you might find what you're looking for.'
