my confession my word's Diary

and then nw yr was knocking the door so i thought to do smethng which can divirt our mind so it was 31st

and we went with our friends and i did my 2nd mistake i drink whole nit yupp in the opon road
its was fr thtatym awsome bt afr that i faild contring my self in that tym when i was fully drunked mou took me home and aftr that for me asuasl mou ha to suufer it was arng i knw bt what i can do..........
it happnd with me always when i alwasys think about my x and my sister i start feeling hate my self

i dont want tahat bt its happend atumaticly

i start hateng my self and thought that one ay he will come back bt i was wrng when again a bogous incident happnd

then i gave her a confused look and ask "what's wrong with u now?ny problem?"she took my last support and continued "he said that he can't continue this" (what the f nw mou is also in same position lyk me????)i thought in my mind because i was shocked


(i never thought that that dumbo boy c have this audasity to dump her..i alwasys told her she is always much better than every thing from that boy...its true guys my bestest buddy is very beautiful with talent she is topper in her collage an that boy is fat ugly never ever touch books though mou always loves him because we girls always respect every ones feeling....but at the end what happend that boy leave mou in the middle of the road only for he belongs from hindu bramhin family and mou is a muslim girl.........shi such a own market he was...)



nw the situatn is i cant control my self though i have to control mou because she was also broken why god why always me ;(

so one day i went to commit suicide but i failed...from that day i came to knw that m fully a dumbo.......i cant commit even suicide....nyways so i went there where ususaly we 2 always came to have sme fun and sat on the bench and start smoking aftr the 4th one i saw mou."oh my god what the hell she is doing here?"..she give me an angry luk and sat beside me and said"listn u cant go nywhere with out me"and give me a smile with eyes full of tears......

i was broken fully .i dnt even knw what to do so i decied to cme bak hme and spnded sme few days there with my family i prayd to gods thousand times to bring him back bt ntng happnd.so i try to stard a nrmal life bt that time nthng hapnd i faild then i thought i quiet yes i decided to quiet ...........

so aftr al those stuff i came to knw that i came to knw all these happnd for my sweet sisy.it was a game played by her just to broke my heart.....and that boy just follwd hr directn such a og he was.but u knw smethng i never acusd him bcoz if my sistr can do dis with me so he was third person .so that is it..nw i have to suffer all those stuff bcoz i realy dnt have any othr frnds and support...so it was am ifficult for me

all those days was the one of mine nicest days i ever have.any ways but i thng no one like my happiness and after all every morning has a dark full night ending y not with my life also....i ill always say this that he ill be always a gu bf because he knows hw to pamper a girl.any ways the ba day came sundenly he text me up that msg and the aftr story u all know i think if not plz see the privious posts

nw two girl is their no pnpc will hapnd its imposible.so we start that.and i came to knw my sisy got a nw nfrnd or brothr type in her clg.though she have alot of friends in her clg bcoz her most of the scl frnds are in that clg.ny ways she created intrst for that boy in me and that day nit he cld my sisy and form that day we start takng with each othr.and in few days he bcme onet of my clse and spcl frnd.we usd to meet in twice in week.and aftr few days he propsed me though i hav feelingsa bt i said no.and aftr one week i agreed and we stard a nice cute relatnshp.we was vry gud with each othr.and i was top of the world..i was happy enough..

"listn ur mom calld me up if i want i can tll that what the shit u have done bt i didnt bcause m not so cruel.listn that was miy boyfriend with whom u did al those shit.he told me up what kind of cheap girl u r so be aware"my sweet sisy msg me....
the msg give me a huge shock a mini heart attack on spot i loose my sence and fell on the crossing
when my eyres opnd i saw am lyng in a an bench of mou's lap nd many unknwn faces staring on me and passing comment.when i feld little btr i went and to a park and said the whole story to mou...


now its ur turn to knw the actal story

ok m girl came to leave with my cousins whic house is only 5 min distance of my collage so i came there.it was our plan that i ill leave there only fr few days to serch a nice hostl fr me then i ill shift.so nit was before of my freshers nit i was lyng in the bed with my cousin sisy and taking with her about her cllg life bcoz she took admissn one of the best cllg in the city....though bits very expnsive also and my parents cant afrd that and we belong frm a same batch fr that we had a ny bonding bettwen us(i always thought that)

so i became a female devdas type and my buddy mou was alsosuffering because i was reacting like a kid whoes favorite toy either has been lost or been broken (but this time actualy the kid's heart is broken).anyways she was vry tensd fr me bcoz i was totally out of me.but i always thank to my god that for only this situation i found my bestest buddy mou who was always with me in my al situation.

althose bloody stuff was happening with me anothr shocking msg i gt from my fb inbox.which was send by my one and only cousin sister(i dont want to say her real name so m calling her "xxx")xxx. i was stanmdin in a road crossing and waiting for mou who went to meet with her brother and at that situation i got the text......

guys i hope you all r liking my story waiting for ur reply
so back to my confession

"give me 2 goldflake light"i said to the shop keeper....(.yes rit i started smoking which is simply takes me to wards to death bcoz m asthama patient i knw that preety well that but at the end it feel me relaxed....)ok then i took those shit went towards mou who was standing a little far away bcoz she is quiet shy about the fag in the public places though i dont have althose stuff......

then we smoke our 12 rs in few mints and went back to our rum......it was not so good atall

i dont knw allthat day what happnd with me bcoz i usd to nleave like a dukhi atma with nothing left in my life... i usd to cry the whole day (i think every person do this after a rejection very few can positvly or sportingly take this and i was in that huge percentage of peoples)

"its ok you deserve much better than him"the usual diolouge said by her...."i love him"i cried....she said nothing and said"chal kahi ghum k atte hain".....
we went to walk were i said her my all sweet memories with him......
it was bad i thought that it was the worse day in my life.....but i was wrng life were ready to give me a lots of shocks and ready to make my life worst......
and then all the mistakes i stard my life sucks me

"what the shit r u doing in the room?"she shouted at me entering an the room.and saw my phone lying in the foor.she picked the samsung chat on which was already being swticed of after falling.she took the ph i was just sitting in my bed in front of her and staring at her with tears full of eyes...then she swicd on my ph and and started checking my phone whats wrong.i said to check my in box she saw the msg and give me a big hug which i needed that time.....

i was pretty shocked after the a small text msg i.e "all over and i quiet bye for ever"
then phone bounced from my hand to the floor and i sat on the floor and the tear drops atomaticly came out from my eyes the door was closed....i can hear that some one is calling is caliing me to take my lunch......and then every thing became blank...after few minutes i started understood the fact and went to open the the door of my room.Mou(my best friend and my rum mate)is standing and giving me a angry look.