a's Diary

Yuhuhu! I just came back yesterday from this awesome 3-day trip with old friends. Initially, there was a hesitation in me, some issues concerned me like there was a lot of work I had to leave behind, and I was feeling uneasy about it. I thought that may be I won't be able to have fun in this kind of situation, and may be it wasn't the right time. But my friends convinced me somehow. After listening to them, I thought that perhaps it's the right thing to do right 'now'. I mean it was a great opportunity to relax and have some fun. Moreover, if I would have stayed back, there would have been great pressure over me to work really hard, and I know how that turns out for me every time. I listened to my heart and it was the right decision. So, I decided to go.
We took off on Saturday morning. It was a beautiful morning in Delhi (I rarely get a chance to see mornings :P). We were eight guys in two cars heading towards Bhimtal (a hill station near nainital). While it was a 300km journey and in new well maintained cars, it was still a pretty long journey, as it had a patch where we had to move at 5km/hr for around 10 kms! That was tiring and really frustrating. Somehow we reached our destination, Country Inn, a beautiful resort in Bhimtal. It took us 9 hrs to complete the journey but it was all worth it, when we first jumped in the pool, minutes after we stuffed our luggage in our cottage. We all were feeling a little dizzy in the pool as we were enormously tired and drunk( I forgot to mention a couple of Jack Daniel's pegs and Vodka shots that we took as soon as we reached our rooms). So then we had fun playing water-polo for an hour almost. After this, we moved in the resort exploring places and avenues to have fun for the next two days. And it was dinner time now. It was a buffet. We ate like we haven't eaten in years- right upto the throat! Then we played a little table tennis and finally went back to our cottage. It was great fun the whole day, mixed with tiredness, excitement, dizziness and finally smoke!
We all just lied down watching television now, and after half an hour or so, I figured out that all were asleep except the two of us. So we decided to have some rest as well.
I woke up the earliest next day. Went out in the garden, gazing at the sun, feeling the fresh air, and smoking a puff :P. It was the beginning of the most amazing and fun day of my life!

Yesterday, there was this traditional see off day for passing out people from our college. People were getting so nostalgic, and emotional, getting their photos clicked with their batch mates. I didn't feel a thing nor did I wanted to have any memories, probably because these weren't my batch people. They have long gone a year ago. I am still here as they were B.tech and I had to complete one more year to get my post grad degree(B. M.tech). God knows how I am doing with that, anyway later So anyway, memories of past year flashed before me, and I tried to find 'her' in my memories but she wasn't there anymore. I was feeling a little low, fortunately not long after I could use a smoke. Later, I watched a movie to pass the night. While on my bed, I wondered when is 'it' all over. People say it so many times- Its all over but what do they mean? Do they mean, they are starting a new life and that the past is gone-gone or they mean there is nothing more to do in life. I remember saying it once in my life, soon to realize that it wasn't, not at least for quite sometime.
I don't know if it's over yet. Oh! I was there again, and I never wanted to remember back any of it. I couldn't sleep and then slowly I pushed my hand down and used it to ejaculate some fluid, and soon I was far from awake.